ABOUT ME

​

From the time she was a child, Scout Zabinski felt things more deeply than was comfortable, the blessing and curse of being both artist and addict. Zabinski was conceived in an attempt to save her parents and their marriage, yet they divorced by the time she was 5. She grew up in an emotionally, physically and sexually abusive home until the age of 13 when she moved out to attend boarding school. Zabinski thrived academically but developed an eating disorder and nearly died at age 16 due to anorexia. Though she visibly recovered physically enough to win her age division of the New York City Marathon, whilst studying at NYU, Zabinski’s food restriction transformed into an eight year battle with bulimia. 

 

Zabinski did not attend art school, but painting became an escape from daily self harm. Attempting to heal her body dysmorphia, largely collected from her violent alcoholic father who also struggled with eating disorders, Zabinski participated in her first nude photoshoot. This act of self reclamation turned traumatic when the elder photographer drugged and raped her. Zabinski used the images to create her first nude self portraits, attempts to navigate her own psyche and address PTSD. One year later, at age 22, she remembered being sexually abused as a child. 

 

Zabinski spent years attempting any self-help method available, including reiki, hypnosis, medications, in-patient rehab, religion, and therapy. Eventually she found her way to 12 Step Recovery rooms. Today, attributed to “nothing short of a miracle”, Zabinski is not only fully recovered from her eating disorders and substance addiction but also an active member, sponsor and founder in the Los Angeles community of Alcoholics Anonymous, Sex and Love Addicts Anonymous and Adult Children of Alcoholics. Zabinski continues to paint while pursuing her true passion in helping other addicts and artists on their own journeys.